While the Olympic runners were preparing to take to the track in China, I happened to watch a very different race on a very different track.

The runner who caught my eye, Wasserman, would never qualify for the Olympics. He’s won only eight times in 38 career races. He wasn’t expected to win this race either.

This was a big race and the competition was fierce. Racers came from as far as Canada to compete and, in the mix, there were a few well known runners who were expected to win.

The news buzz centered mainly on these runners. Wasserman, therefore, just got a brief warm-hearted story for being the hometown favorite.

But this was Wasserman’s track. He knew it well and had won races on it. This particular race, however, presented a problem. The distance was a mile.

In eight tries, Wasserman had never won a mile race. Therefore, while his fans loved him, many didn’t give him a chance in this race.

Howard Belvoir, the man who trained Wasserman, believed differently. While Wasserman wasn’t as talented as the other runners, he was tenacious. Belvoir said of his runner, “The thing about this guy is that he tries. He tries harder than his ability.”

When the race began, however, the faster runners sprinted out to the front, leaving Wasserman last. I sighed with regret. Like everyone else, I turned my attention to the front runners and missed Wasserman’s quiet move forward.

He passed one runner, then the next until he had almost reached the two leading runners. At this point, the announcer called out in surprise, “And here comes Wasserman.” Suddenly, I found myself shouting over and over again, “Go Wasserman, go!”

I held my breath as the runners reached the final turn. Could he do it? Could Wasserman finally win a mile race? Slowly, he began to edge in front.

The other runners didn’t make it easy for Wasserman. As usual, he had to work very hard for this race. But just as they came to the wire, he managed a final surge.

Wasserman had done it. He won the 2008 Longacre Mile!

I jumped off my couch and screamed, “You go Wasserman!” The crowd went berserk with excitement. Their hometown hero was victorious.

While I enjoyed the many victories of the Olympic runners, it was this race and this athlete who moved me to tears. Unfortunately there wasn’t a medal for Wasserman, but he didn’t care. He’d done his job and all he wanted was to drink some water and eat some hay.

You see Wasserman is a six-year-old, gelding racehorse.

When Wasserman won this race he made history. His jockey, Jennifer Whitaker, became the first woman jockey to win the Longacre Mile. It was also the first Longacre victory for his breeder, trainer AND owner, Howard Belvoir.

What was really sweet is by winning, Wasserman “who tries harder than his ability” nominated himself for the season-ending championship of Thoroughbred racing, The Breeder’s Cup.

Some may say he just did what he was bred to do, but I saw the moment after the race when Wasserman stopped on the track, his sides heaving from his effort. He looked up at the crowd, as if to say, “See, I did it!”

I hope that the next time I’m struggling and think I don’t have what it takes, I will remember Wasserman’s race and think to myself, “If Wasserman can do it, so can I.”

Recently, I learned just how difficult applying for private health insurance can be in the United States. As I was going off my group health insurance, I needed private coverage. Through the assistance of my insurance agent, I completed the initial on-line application in less than an hour.

That was the easy part.

A week after completing the application, I got a call from what is called the “medical” department of the insurance company for a follow-up to my application. Evidently, to expedite the application process, the insurance company now uses subcontractors for these follow up calls.

And here’s where things got a bit rough.

I was totally unprepared for the type of questions I was asked. The woman who interviewed me asked about medical claims, most of which were not recent. She wanted very detailed information that is kept in my medical records and not at home. In addition, some of her questions seemed totally inappropriate. For example, she asked me what BRAND of over-the-counter vitamins I took and if I had taken my vitamin that day!

At first, I tried to be helpful, but rapidly realized this wasn’t meant to be a friendly call. After repeatedly answering “I don’t know,” I asked her to contact my doctors. Instead, she continued to ask me the same questions over and over again. It felt like an interrogation. After an hour of grilling me, she finally agreed to a three-way call to my doctors, who answered her questions.

By the time I hung up the phone, I felt like I gone three rounds with Mike Tyson. I was both frustrated that I couldn’t answer her questions and emotionally exhausted by her aggressive attitude. From the beginning, she treated as if I was guilty of some crime when all I had done was apply for private health insurance.

To give the company credit, when they heard about my experience, they apologized for the way the woman had handled the call. Not many companies would do this and it says good things about this company. However, it didn’t change my experience, which was miserable and something I wouldn’t wish on anyone!

However, this story has a positive side to it.

Because of what happened to me, I decided to learn about my rights when applying for private health insurance. It’s my hope that what I learned may help you, or someone you know, avoid what happened to me. I have compiled a list of tips that might help you if you are applying for health insurance in the United States.

NOTE: Because the list I compiled is long, I’ve added it to my PAGES section, under the title of USA Health Insurance Tips. You can find the PAGES section in the column to the right or go to http://sarahealy.com/index.php/usa-health-insurance-tips/

I hope you find these suggestions helpful. Just keep in mind that if you need private health insurance in the United States, you may get a follow-up call just like I did. If so, the best policy is to adopt the Boy Scout motto of “BE PREPARED!”

When a friend recommended the OSHO Zen Tarot Cards to me, I was a bit skeptical. I had tried the traditional Tarot cards and didn’t really like them, but the OSHO cards are different. I like them because they are very thought provoking and gentle. I occasionally pull a card to see if it speaks to me about where I am right now.

Today, I pulled the card called EXISTENCE.

When I read the commentary about this card, I loved it immediately. The message was very nurturing and filled me with a sense of comfort. It’s a message I want to share with you. Here’s what this card says:

“You are not accidental. Existence needs you. Without you something will be missing in existence and nobody can replace it. That’s what gives you dignity, that the whole existence will miss you. The stars and sun and moon, the trees and birds and earth - everything in the universe will feel a small place is vacant which cannot be filled by anybody except you.”

If you want to make this message even more powerful, change the pronoun “YOU” to “I” and read the message again. Here’s a sample of the first three lines:

I am not accidental.

Existence needs ME!

Without ME something will be missing in existence and nobody can replace it!

Do you feel how empowering these lines are? Let them remind you just how essential you are to this world. It doesn’t matter whether you’re on top of world or feeling as if the whole world is resting on your shoulders, you are, and always will be, unique and special.

And existence needs you! Never forget this.

If you want more information about the OSHO Zen Cards, go to http://www.osho.com and click on Zen Tarot.

When I was a kid, I used to have a special tree. It was easy to climb and had a perfect place to sit. This tree made me feel safe and it held me through happy and sad times. It was my own sanctuary.

Sanctuary means different things to different people. To some, a sanctuary is the place to share their religion and to others, it is a haven from oppression and cruelty. I believe sanctuaries are also personal places we go to escape, feel safe, and rest.

For many years, I forgot about the importance of having a sanctuary. I was raising my kids, working, and constantly on the go. My life was busy and there never seem to be time to find a new sanctuary. But somewhere inside of me, I missed my tree and the peace it gave me.

Then I got a cat. My agreement upon adopting her was that she would be an inside cat. But Aggie was meant to be outside, stalking and watching the birds and other animals.

Aware of her unhappiness, I decided to screen in my porch and let her be out there. I also added a bird bath and another bird feeder, which gave Aggie lots to watch without damage to either cat or bird.

It wasn’t long before I was watching the birds along with Aggie. Now, I go out frequently at the end of the day when the feeder becomes a very busy place. I sit in an old rocking chair and just watch nature going about her business.

When I’m there, rocking and watching, I forgot all the things I’ve should have done and all the things I need to do. Instead, I feel safe, at peace, and restful. I do believe I have found my new sanctuary!

What about you? Do you have your own personal sanctuary?

If you don’t have one, I encourage you to create it. It might be a garden, a meditation room or just a room full of colors, pictures and other things you love. The important thing is to make it your own special place where you can go to rest, feel safe and be at peace.

Once you have your sanctuary, visit it frequently. Treat your visits like any other important activity during your day. Make an appointment for yourself. Write it in your calendar or put up a sticky note to remind yourself to spend time in your sanctuary.

It’s GOOD to allow yourself a place to unwind, feel safe, and enjoy the present. I don’t think you will regret it. I know I haven’t!

My boyfriend loves golf and has recently started playing again, which means I am now learning more about the sport by necessity. While watching the U.S. Open last weekend, an announcer mentioned something about a golfer wishing he could have a Mulligan. Curious about this term, I asked my boyfriend what a Mulligan is.

Turns out a Mulligan is a second shot permitted without a stroke penalty. So, when you hit your ball into a pasture with the big, black bull or into the lake with the alligator, you get to use your Mulligan. It’s the ultimate golfers “do-over!” I must add that these shots are never given in official/professional tournaments, but they do occur in friendly every day matches.

Wow!

I can think of lots of times in my life when I would have loved to say, “Oops, my bad. Can I have a Mulligan?”

As much as we’d love to have a Mulligan when we’ve really screwed up, it’s just not going to happen. Life isn’t generally a friendly game that allows penalty free “do-overs.” However, it does allow us to learn from our mistakes so when we step up to take the next shot, we’re more prepared.

What about you?

Are there times in your life when you made a mistake for which you would have LOVED a Mulligan? If so, ask yourself the following questions:

• What happened to cause the mistake?

• What would I do differently?

• What did I learn from it?

• How can I put the mistake behind me?

I recommend writing your answers down and don’t skip that last question as it’s very important. Tiger Woods is a great golfer because he takes time to learn from his mistakes and then he lets them go. Hanging on to the memory of a mistake makes it even harder to take the next shot.

While I like the idea of Mulligans in the game of golf, I don’t believe they would make the game of life better. We are supposed to make mistakes. They are a part of life. It’s how we grow and learn. I believe we will be better players if we don’t get free shots.

Driving in the mountains of Switzerland is a lesson in patience. My boyfriend and I decided to visit a small town at the top of a nearby mountain. To get there, we had to take a very scary mountain road.

If you were a Formula One driver, this would be the road for you. As we went up, the road narrowed and the hairpin turns became more frequent. This meant we would drive into a blind turn and often find ourselves squeezing by a big farm truck.

To add to our nervousness, the only guardrails were wooden fences meant to keep the cows from dropping off the mountain, not the cars. Hey, when agriculture is a major business, you have get your priorities right!

I found the drive terrifying and to deal with my fear, kept giving my boyfriend driving advice. As you can imagine, he became rather annoyed (rightly so) at me.

This led to our first Swiss fight, not a good thing in a country that prides itself on its neutrality!

Once we were at the top, my boyfriend parked the car and turned to me to say, “Hey, I’m driving the car and it’s hard enough. A little more encouragement and a little less advice would be nice.”

He had a point.

This was a tough lesson for me, especially as a life coach. While I thought I was being helpful, I had forgotten a main concept in life coaching, which is “clients are whole, resourceful and creative.”

Driving up that mountain road was difficult for my boyfriend, but he was perfectly capable of doing it. If he needed help, he would have asked me. He is whole, resourceful and creative.

But, let’s face it. It’s so tempting to give advice, thinking it will be helpful. Falling into this trap, however, is a mistake. Advice is fine when someone asks for it, but when you give it without permission, it usually makes the person feel worse, rather than better.

Unasked for advice implies a lack of trust that the person can resolve whatever they’re dealing with on their own. Sometimes people need to struggle and figure out their own way of getting through a difficult time.

As a friend, we need to listen, ask questions, but basically help the person find their own solutions.

Think about it. How do you feel when you find your own way out of a problem? I know from my own experience, it’s a very empowering feeling!

Okay, I know what you’re thinking. We all have the friend that talks and talks, but never seems to find a resolution. If this happens, ask the person if they really want to solve the problem.

Give the responsibility back to them. Ask if they can think of one or two things they could do that might help or ask if they want you to suggest ideas. The key word here is to “ask,” not tell.

The next time you have a friend struggling with a problem, consider asking if he or she wants your advice. If they don’t, let them know that you trust them. I think your friend will appreciate you all the more for believing in them.

Remember, in a car there really IS only one driver.

Bonjour!

I am currently writing this post from Switzerland. I’m living in a small mountain village in the western part of the country. To describe where I’m staying as ‘picturesque’ would be totally inadequate; it’s simply too beautiful for words. Every day I get up and, like Meg Ryan in “French Kiss”, I’m tempted to say, “Beautiful, beautiful, wish you were here!”

On the other hand, the Alps are not puny little Florida hills or sand dunes; they are very BIG mountains! As the village sits pretty high up in the mountains and my apartment even higher, getting places isn’t easy. This leads me to my first Switzerland lesson.

What Goes DOWN Must Come UP.

Everyone in this village WALKS. You see them walking to and from work on roads that might make a mountain goat hesitate. And they walk with little effort, making it look deceptively easy to a crazy American tourist.

Guess what? It’s not.

One of the first things I decided to do was take the short cut down to the center of town. This path involves many, many steps. As you walk down, the incline becomes so steep it feels like you need a rope to keep from flying forward. But, I’d seen others walking this way and I figured if they could do it, so could I.

I took my time and made it down without too much bother. I did some shopping, explored the village, and then decided to go back to my apartment. I stood at the bottom of the path and made my first mistake.

I looked up.

Oh, my gosh, what seemed easy coming down, looked monstrous going up. I wasn’t sure I could make it back to the top, as the steps seemed endless!

I wish I could say the trip up was easier than I thought. It wasn’t. It was very, very hard. Months on a stair master couldn’t prepare me for this climb. Half way up, I seriously considered turning back and trying my luck at hitchhiking back to my apartment.

In the end, just plain old persistence kept me moving and perhaps a bit of vanity. I was NOT going to be that stupid tourist who climbed down the mountain and then couldn’t get back up. While I had to stop often and pretend to contemplate the beautiful views just to catch my breath and slow my heart, I managed to slowly climb up step by step.

When I finally reached the top, sweaty and out of breath, I was totally thrilled with myself. While it may not have been pretty or easy, I had done it! I climbed up those very steep mountain steps!

Isn’t this like life? There are times when we’re coasting along, feeling confident and satisfied and then BOOM something comes up. It may be a crisis or it may be a new challenge. Either way, it can seem just as overwhelming as my staircase seemed to me.

If this has ever happened to you, maybe what I learned from my climb in Switzerland can help you.

I learned that successfully getting through a challenge or crisis means you need to keep moving, even if you want to turn back or quit. I learned it’s important to set your own pace and that it’s okay to go slowly or take a break. I learned if I was patient and took each step one at a time, I would eventually reach my destination.

If you do these things, I believe you WILL also reach your destination. And when you do, I’m confident you will be as thrilled about what you accomplished as I was after climbing my mountain staircase.

Au revoir!

Ah, it’s just beginning.  You can sense it now. Spring is about to be sprung.  Along with the melting snow, flowers slowly opening, and yards showing just a bit of green, it is also getting closer to time to think about vacation.

Have you been planning what you might take on your vacation?  Okay, raise your hand if in addition to your bathing suit, you plan to pack your laptop, PDA, or other ways to contact your work. While I obviously can’t see you, I imagine there are a few hands slowly being raised.

STOP!!!!! What do you think the word VACATION means?  Well, most dictionaries define it as “leisure time away from work.”  The key words here are “time AWAY from WORK. 

I don’t believe we do “away from work” very well in this country.  Having a daughter living in another country has taught me that not all cultures view vacations as we do in the States.  For example, when my daughter goes on vacation she’s not expected to answer her cell phone, call in to work, or check her emails.  Where she lives, it’s okay to “vacate” work for a period of time.

What about you? Can you go on a vacation and cut the umbilical cord that connects you to work?  If your answer isn’t yes, consider asking yourself the following:

What stops me from letting go of my work? 

It’s easy to believe we are so essential to our work that we can’t leave it.  For some of us, even being sick isn’t a good reason for not working; we just work at home.  But is your work really worth losing the benefits you gain by letting your mind and body really relax? Remember, work is just one part of your life.  Think about putting it down for awhile and pay attention to the others.

Would the world fall apart if I couldn’t be reached?

For some people, there are important reasons they MUST be reachable.  For most of us, however, it just a fear that everything would crumble to the ground if we took time away from work. Therefore, our need to keep in contact is more of a guilty SHOULD. Only you can figure out whether or not your need is a “should” or a “must.”  If it’s a “should”, then seriously consider leaving that gremlin behind.

What do I need to do to plan my vacation escape?

In the weeks before vacation, what can you do to make sure you DON’T need to check in with work?  Plan ahead.  Finish projects or delegate what you can’t get done to other people. Do the things that will make it possible for you to leave your work behind without guilt.

Consider these questions as you plan your vacation this year. For my part, I encourage you to put an “away message” on your laptop and then walk out the door. Once you leave, LET WORK GO and don’t look back! Give yourself permission to take a real vacation by taking “leisure time away from work.” 

I finally did it.  I got a new computer.  It is sleek, trim and all things fancy!  Wait for it; here comes the “but.” My new computer also has a new operating system called Windows Vista.

I conned my boyfriend into helping me set up the new computer as I’m not the best at putting things together.  He worked very hard and was extremely patient with me.  It was like he was the doctor helping with a birth and I the nervous father, pacing outside the room.

There were, of course, problems in transferring my files to the new operating system.  At one point we had to completely start over.  I was totally freaked.  Even as my boyfriend was trying to talk to a Microsoft tech, I was complaining about the new technology.  He finally banned me from the room.

This was when I realized I don’t do change very well.

Because I was annoyed with both my boyfriend and the computer problems, I took myself out to the porch with the dog and cat. It was a beautiful day.  We are in full bloom in northern Florida.  Winter has changed into spring. 

Where I live, this change is dramatic.  Azaleas, dogwoods and numerous other flowers are beautifully painting the landscape.  Other than the green coating of pollen, I truly love the change from brown winter to colorful spring. I rejoice in this change!

Why don’t I rejoice in the change from my old computer to the new one? Partly because it IS a new system and bugs have to be worked out.  A much bigger part, however, is that I’m scared of this new computer.  Will I do something wrong and mess it up?  It’s so fancy that I almost don’t want to touch it.  Instead, I want to continue to use my old computer because I know it; it’s familiar.

Sitting on my porch and watching nature change by the second, I realized change is always part of our lives.  We have to change to grow.  Being able to change and adapt to new things is what has kept us, as a people, going for gazillions of years.  I guess I can do my part.  If I learned how to go from DOS to Windows, I can certainly learn Vista.

In addition, I can also learn to thank my boyfriend. He’s a bit more daring about change than I.  So, I thank you, JC for all the work you did.  I do believe this Nervous Nelly is now ready to enjoy changing to her new computer.